Gossips from Camer (Part Two)

By Writam-Pen

My People, I salute everyone! Last week when I said that this country is sick some people who are guilty to have contributed to the mess could not allow my phone to rest. I was obliged to swift off my phone to preserve my battery. Do not be afraid. Am I not a free man and by the way, who is going to arm-twist with me? They are the ones who are trying to mask the skeletons in their cupboard not me. I hear our MPs stage another protest for unpaid salaries. You know ever since they were elected they have not received their car loan which ranges from 35 million FCFA for Bureau members to 8 million FCFA for hand clappers. This is the third time that MPs have gone on rampage in 2 years. The first strike was on the reimbursement of car loan, the second was on the extra car allowances during the extension of their mandate and this third strike on non-payment of salaries and car loans. I hope you are aware that after the first strike, the car loan became non-refundable unlike before that only Bureau members used to enjoy the privileges.

I say ehn! FECAFOOT don turn na FECAFOOD. Another incident has just happened that makes me unwell of this country.  In fact, I do not know whether I should be crying or smiling over the issue. However, I know that my detractors will climb on tree tops to defend the epileptic regime for selfish purpose. What I have observed is that the main problem in this country is that of marginalization. The latest scandal of the week is that Masso Yo, the chairman of the Normalization Committee of FECAFOOD, oh sorry I mean FECAFOOT published the list of media organs to cover the upcoming football jamboree in Brazil. And for your information, Massa Yo and his team just demonstrated that FECAFOOD is a chop-pot reserve only for Frogs and not Anglos. They have officially declared the Cameroon food-ball (I mean football) federation is a no go zone for Anglos. This is so because no English Speaking media organ features on the list of names of media organs submitted to FIFA to cover the June 2014 World Cup in Brazil. Is this not another mark of gross marginalization? Or could we call it tribalism? Remember that the same Frogs used JB Ndeh to chase away Iya Mohammed. When time came for JB to take over the management of FECAFOOD, Massa Yo cooked up a scheme with the royal blessings of Sebb Blatter to dive in through the window under the guise of Normalization Committee. I think if you have never ever heard of a country where meritocracy is a taboo, come closer to Cameroon and you will be able to write books.  Anglophone Sport reporters of the print media are raising hell and threatening to boycott all FECAFOOD activities. I hear, their association wrote to FIFA and Monsieur Sebb Blatter replied that his hands are tied and that he cannot pork-nose into national issues. Is this not the same Sebb Blatter who ordered for the putting in place of the normalization committee? Food-ball na really mafia. This is something serious especially as it is happening at this point in time that much is being talked about reunification. 

Talking about reunification, it is now clear that Popol will not be in Buea on February 11, 2014 predicted by your writam-pen. Speculations as to whether Popol will present his 31^st script to the youths from the former capital of West Cameroon have come to null. Buea catches fire again. Over 25 houses were consumed by fire. I am sure Popol will make a Presidential largess to the victim especially now that the CPDM has been mobilizing militants to come out in their numbers to come out and march on youth day. You see that Popol has decided to politicize almost everything. I know you may be wondering how political parties will march on Youth Day. Take it easy, you know le Cameroun, c’est le Cameroun. Since Popol has maintain seal lips on the exact date of reunification celebration, no one knows whether this will be all about the reunification or it is just Part One that will be celebrated in all the sub divisional headquarters nationwide. I hear the Divisional Officers and Senior Divisional Officers will be swimming in gombo. Popol has decided to deep his hand into the state treasury to fruit bills for the organization of the event. Yesterday February 8, clean-up campaigns were organized in all the major towns nationwide. I even spotted gendarmes and police parading the street with riffles as if we are in the old days Bagdad or present Syria. Do not ask me the significance of Youth Day because I don’t know and I don’t even want to know. Poor youths!

Weh! Before I forget let me use this opportunity to say Happy Youth Day to all young Cameroonians including those who will be 50 years old on February 11 and I also beg your pardon to Happy Birth Day to Popol who clocked 81 years this week. We are blessed.

I don bad for Prime Minister Yang e village. Guess what? While other youths were busy preparing for Youth Day Celebration, I hear students of GBHS Elak-Oku went on rampage due to lack of teachers. But Prime Minister Yang was smarter than them. Yang to foil the strike immediately ordered for 11 teachers to be transferred to the school. The student had threatened to burn down the school building. A friend of mine hinted me that other schools in the North West Region are also threatening to go on rampage for the same motives. As you all know, Popol and co only know one language, strike.

As youths are preparing to celebrate Youth Day on February 11, a French Language newspaper has just revealed disturbing figures about the unemployment rate in the country. The paper says over 1 million Cameroonians are jobless with over 80% of them being youths.

Massa Popol get too much headache these days. Vanessa Tchatchou whose child was stolen at the Yaounde Reference Hospital has written to Popol. She is still after her stolen baby. This time I hear heads will roll.

I am sure you most have got the latest info about the former President of FECAFOOD, Iya Mohammed. The man has spark fire from his Kondengui prison cell decrying that he is being maltreated as if he is a highway robber. These magidas are becoming a real headache to Popol. The other it was Marafa Hamidou Yaya who after series of open letters resurfaced in Jeune Afrique. I hear Popol is having sleepless nights with them. Last week, a conference on late President Ahmadou Adhijo was announced for Garoua. Ngola (Yaounde) immediately caught cold. The organizers we hear were interrogated by elements of the Judiciary Police for public disorder. I hope you know Dr. Aminatou Ahdijo, the daughter of late President Adhijo who campaigned for Popol’s CPDM at the last September Municipal/Legislative Elections. Wicked whispers say she was spotted in a hotel in Ngola patiently waiting for compensation from Popol. Surely, she is waiting to be appointed minister. Now that Popol is back in the capital city, there is total panic in government sphere. Ministers, Minister Delegates, Secretary of States, Directors of State Corporation are panicking. I hear the marabouts are making huge money from them. Weh, this country get fever.

My people as I was trying this piece a friend of mine sent me a text message indicating that the Anglophone Community is hit again by an untimely death. He also mentioned that our big sister; Mafor Yah Yefon Ama Tutu Muna, Minister of Arts and Culture has lost a close member of her family in a ghastly motor accident. This is really sad. What can we do to stop these reckless truck drivers of HYSACAM from killing innocent Cameroonians?

God’s time they say is the best. You know Popol always spring surprises. Last week, when into his score board of Green, Red and Yellow to replace the red card which catapulted Bebang Chumbow to the post of Board Chairman of Dschang University to the detriment of Senator Bochong Francis Nkwain.

Boko Haram is on the lead again. A Canadian priest almost fell into their trap last week. I am sure they should be regretting that they missed a golden opportunity to make fcfa billions. Massa, with the high unemployment rate, I hear China, India and Korea will invest close to FCFA 1.2 trillion. This is big money. I hope they will not employ only their own people. Away from that rumours abound that Set Mobile is at the brinks of collapse. Somebody, help! Help! Let this not happen.

I almost forgot about the trumpeted bilingualism in Camroon. Our little bilingualism is much of a window dressing that it begins and ends in two days every year. Why are these guys disturbing our children on this issue of bilingualism? I will not hold my breadth a second to say it is a mess. I heard children singing songs and reciting in languages that they do not even understand what they are saying. Bye-Bye….C U Next Time.   

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