There are several common mistakes
married couples make which ensure that their marriage gets off to a bad start.
The good news is that these pitfalls can easily be avoided.
The
day you get married is the happiest day of your life. It’s the day you have
spent the last few years dreaming about, and everything must go smoothly
and perfectly just like you have dreamed it would. It is the day you will be
gazing lovingly into the eyes of the love of your life while your heart is
beating faster than it should. It is nothing short of bliss. Both of you are
happy to have found each other.
But hard work lies ahead of you both to sustain your relationship. The thing is that marriage doesn’t come gift-wrapped. It comes in kit form, which means that you and your partner have to work at things. And you will find out as the years roll by that in a marriage, there are often just as many lows as there are highs.
As much as couples would rather keep their marriage drama-free, the reality is that this is just not always possible.
But hard work lies ahead of you both to sustain your relationship. The thing is that marriage doesn’t come gift-wrapped. It comes in kit form, which means that you and your partner have to work at things. And you will find out as the years roll by that in a marriage, there are often just as many lows as there are highs.
As much as couples would rather keep their marriage drama-free, the reality is that this is just not always possible.
However,
there are several common mistakes married couples make which ensure that their
marriage gets off to a bad start. The good news is that these pitfalls can
easily be avoided.
Get your marriage off to an awesome start by avoiding these 10 mistakes:
Focusing on the wrong things
Get your marriage off to an awesome start by avoiding these 10 mistakes:
Focusing on the wrong things
They
say that there is no truer saying than life is what you make of it. But what does
this phrase actually mean? It means different things to different people. If
you focus on the bad stuff in life, your life will be negative. If you focus on
the good stuff, your life will be much more positive. It sounds so simple. Yet
so many newly wed couples fall into the trap of getting annoyed by their
partners’ failings. But instead of focusing on his penchant for lying in on a
Sunday morning until noon or having a few beers after work when we want him
home, why not focus on his good qualities a bit more?
Neglecting
kind gestures
When
you were dating, you both couldn’t stop showering each other with kindness.
Don’t stop being kind to your partner because you have married them.
Insisting
that you are always right
This
is a big mistake that many couples make, and sometimes they prefer to be right
than in love. Unfortunately, too many spouses are so insistent on being right
that they compromise their marriage. A relationship is so much more than being
right. Accept that mistakes happen. Accept that sometimes it’s okay not to be
right – even if you are.
Getting
too comfortable
Being
comfortable with one another is perfect. But getting so comfortable that you
stop putting in effort to make your relationship work is a bad thing. Once you
stop putting the effort into your relationship now that you are married, the
fizz disappears. The excitement goes. Don’t get too comfortable. Keep things
edgy and spontaneous.
Failing to talk about money matters
Failing to talk about money matters
Your
money is no longer just yours. You can no longer take a cavalier attitude to
savings and spending. You must talk about your budget with your partner as soon
as you guys tie the knot. Arguments about money are the most explosive types.
Refusing to give your partner their space
Refusing to give your partner their space
If
you adopt a “we’re married now therefore you’re mine and you have to spend all
your time with me” attitude you’re going to kill your marriage before it’s even
started. Sure, you now belong to one another. You share wedding rings, houses
and maybe even bank accounts. But it doesn’t mean you have to do absolutely
everything together. It’s important that you still give your partner some
space. Let air into the relationship by doing things independent of one
another.
Expecting them to be just like you
Expecting them to be just like you
We
all take to marriage differently. Marriage is a big step in anyone’s life, and
although you two are taking the step together, it doesn’t mean you’re going to
think and act in exactly the same way. Look, there will be disagreements about
how to do things. Their habits and expectations of marriage will probably vary
to yours. Don’t expect everything to be absolutely perfect and harmonious. If
you do, you will only find it difficult to react when things don’t go your way.
Talk to each other about things. If you have concerns, raise them. But always
listen to what they have to say.
When News Breaks Out, We Break In. (The 2014 Bloggies Finalist)
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